THEY SAY I INVENTED THE HAT BLOCK, BUT I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT A HAT BLOCK IS
Here I am, standing outside at the corner of 87th and
Riverside Drive. That's right by the Sailors and Soldiers
Monument, if you don't already know; down a few blocks
from Grant's Tomb. You know who's buried in there; sure,
everyone does. But they always leave out his wife, poor
lady. She's in there too. Emelia Rodenberry Rolteagh Julia
Boggs Grant, and mostly just known as Mrs. Grant, to us.
That's OK, not everyone is well-known.
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Grant's Tomb, then, is by Riverside Church. Now, that's
one big-deal place. It's large, and huge, and skirts the river,
high up, and you'd hardly ever know it. The Hudson River
doesn't like to get shunted aside. There's a little section there,
statues, memorial signs all that stuff. It used to be a lot of
Hispanics, almost a Hispanic ghetto in all those adjoining
streets; some dangers too - a playground with some sketchy
sorts always lurking. That's where they invented Sketcher's,
those running shoes or sneakers, or whatever thy are. Just
like how they tell me I invented the Hat Block; but I don't
even know what a hat block is. I thought it was a block in
which you stored your hat. But no, now they tell me it's
more a 'form' than a box, something you put your hat over,
so it doesn't lose shape. For storage, I guess, and not for
everyday use. Now how could they say I 'invented' that,
when I don't even know what it is? Man, this world is mad.
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