BRACKEN
So, this guy says 'that water is
bracken,' and I had to ask him what
that meant, or what he meant by
it anyway, because I was no longer
sure. 'Standing water, too long,
no movement, don't drink.' I said
OK, and then asked where I would
go if I was really thirsty and had
no choice. He pointed away and
said - 'about a mile over, beer at
Milly's.' So, that was that, I went
to Milly's. Somehow, I walked in
there thinking of apples; I didn't
know why but the only thing in my
brain was an old poem by Hart
Crane. 'The apples, Bill, the apples!'
It didn't really apply, couldn't at all,
but something had set me going.
So I walked into Milly's, where there
was nothing much at all, and asked if
they had any Apple Jack, or hard cider.
Turned out they had both, but I just
took a beer, and then another. And
then a shot of Wild Turkey, and then
another. And then another beer. Well,
you see how it goes. I wasn't thirsty
any more, but feeling a real buzz.
I walked out the door - after paying
and all, with the tip, it was all some
thirty dollars later, (boy, don't know
where that goes; money flows), so
as I'm standing outside this guy
comes by walking a horse and I
said 'Why aren't you riding that fool
beast?' and the guy looks my way
and says, 'She went lame,' and then
he spits - too close to my feet for
me to feel any good about, and I said,
'Hey, why'd you do that?' and he says,
'Sorry, it just slipped.' Just like the
stupid horse did, probably, I thought.
-
I never liked horses, they never did
anything for me. I never really knew
any though, because of that - so I
never really gave them a chance to
shine, nor did I ever give myself a
chance to like them. By not knowing
about them, that leaves a big hole.
I used to know girls that liked horses;
all the time, about horses - they'd
board theirs, and go see it, and ride
it, and maintain it, buy feed and oats,
the boarding place would have
retainers and they'd pay like a rent,
pretty substantial too, to have the
horse tended for and looked after,
and they'd come every few days
or every so often, to ride or trot
or just sit around with their loving
horse, and others. None of that
ever did much for me except
get me annoyed about people
wasting their time. And over an
animal that always seemed too
big, to me. Kind of a strange and
fearful creature too. Unsettling.
So, what do I know? I figure that
everyone's got something they
especially revere, and it's personal
to them. I guess I've got nothing
against horses, and there's not any
necessity about any of it, so if it
all becomes part of, say, a girl's
learning process, that's OK. It's
a representational function of the
ideal image come to life. A real
'girl's dream,' if you will. If they
allow all that for Barbie Dolls
and stuff, then they should surely
let it be for horses as well.
-
So, I decided I wasn't really drunk,
just thinking; and I went back
and had another two beers.
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