6567. WHY CAN'T I BE YOU, AND FREE?

WHY CAN'T I BE 

YOU, AND FREE?

I froze my pants off in Philadelphia, walking.

Just my pants, not my ass  -  I still had that.

If there'a a semblance of difference or doubt

therein, you'd better let me know because I'll

most certainly do it again. My inner compass

has no true anything. That needle flies dangerously

'round. I know it's not 1927, but why are you drinking

like it is? One foot up on the other table, and a cut

on your tongue from biting yourself trying to talk.

Yep; and you thought no one was watching.

-

When I get up in the morning, the first thing I usually

do is make coffee  -  just crawling around, mostly

before I pee, though not always. Those first ten minutes

are the most difficult, because I'm still lodged somewhere

else thinking things, from tempermental dreams and 

tempermental other times : like 'why can't I be you?'

and 'why can't I be free?' Meaningless drivel, I'll

grant you that, yet, ten minutes ago, in some other

place of mind and sleep, both statements made a 

ton of sense. Can you, do you, understand me?

-

Now, it's one full day later and I'm trying to convince

you here, in some Philadelphia tiny cavern bar  -  nothing

like a Rotten Ralph's or anything like that  -  that you'd

better stay right here, and that leaving again for California

would make absolutely no sense at all and you'd only come 

back again.Whining about what you did. Ranting about that

guy with the big dick who promised you everything and then

disappeared two days later. Yeah, it's tough when you know 

no one and fall for it all  -  fake premise, false promise, and 

a guy with no background to search in any way. 

Just gone tomorrow, though here today.