10,295. THE VICTORY BRIDGE, BACK WHEN IT WAS THERE

THE VICTORY BRIDGE, 

BACK WHEN IT WAS THERE

I feel like I'm working, even when

I'm working, and when I'm not, I

feel that way too. Once I was the

bridgemaster atop the Victory Bridge.

10 or 12 times a day, maybe, having

to scuttle the traffic and open the

bridge; everybody down below

pissing and moaning because I 

cost them seven minutes, maybe,

on their way to Two Guys or some

stupid store back then. Liquor. Rakes.

And potted plants. If they had a real

place to go they weren't on this bridge

anyway  -  it ran right along and parallel 

to three highways, maybe even five, all

depending on what you count: Routes One 

and Nine and Thirty Five and Parkway 

and 440, and whatever else you need to 

know go look it up. Those are real roads.

This was a dumb-ass path. No one ever

jumped off here either  - wasn't worth it

and wasn't high enough  -  again, real 

jumpers went to the other bridges, where

they could hit real paydirt in one big try;

or whatever you call that. Like the elevator

guy says, 'Going Down.' Mostly, if we

had any problems, they were the head-on

crashes of the drunks. There was no 

divider, and the speed limit went 

unobserved; least-ways I never saw

it and neither, I guess, did they. 

Wrapped around a pole or two, or 

each other. And dead as all get out. 

Victory Bridge? We always called it 

Tragedy Bridge or Trouble Waiting 

to Happen. A few times some jerk 

drove right off the open edge. Not 

the same jerk, but I didn't want to use 

plural, to not blow it all out of proportion. 

Besides, everyone dies alone, as one. 

Ain't that what they say? The old bridge 

is gone now, with the swivel span I 

used to open, from high above, in 

my little wheelhouse. The new one 

they built is atrocious  -  it arcs so 

high into the sky that Saturn itself 

could safely fit under. And now 

there are jumper warning signs every 

200 feet. 'Don't Do It! There is Help!! 

Call...blah,blah'. Like the frenzied 

jumper is gonna' sit there and read, 

and maybe say, 'a phone number! 

Hey, that sounds like a good idea!' 

What a jerky world. Let them jump. 

We got too many people anyway.