Monday, June 10, 2019

11,829. RUDIMENTS, pt. 713

RUDIMENTS, pt. 713
(want to buy a bridge?)
I never lost the light, and the
light's what matters. As if in a
cave, one of resounding echoes,
the light keeps shining. In the
cave, the sound does the same
thing and you'd realize right
off that once that echo-sound
ceased, something big-time had
changed. Most all of my life
has had lengthy connections
to the most basic of things :
paper, pencil, pen, notebook
and books. It's all still like that,
but with the now-addition of
keyboard replacing typewriter,
the connection to the ephemeral
aspects of computer, storage,
retrieval editing, re-doing, etc.,
had thrown most things out of
kilter, though I go on, and
manage too. But, all of this
new materialization (less the
phone aspect, which don't
have and don't share, and
don't, as a practicality, even
understand. Who in the heck
would want to be at someone
else's beck and call and then,
in turn, have to take endlessly
on about the most inane and
banal subjects?)...People don't
understand how that crud affects
their lives. All things matter.
And not all are worth it.
-
One other thing here worth
mentioning, in light of the present
day and how it has affected all of
my past, in memory and experience.
I've written steadily of logic and
linear thinking, and how the dry
and the rational so badly dull our
world and remove from it the
graceful growth and wonderment
which grows from creativity and
openness. Instead, we are left
with edicts and strictures, the
commands and the bottlenecks
of governance, stale thinking,
rules and regulations, and the
overstepping of one group of
people endlessly into the business
of others  -  when it is none of their
business at all. Here's my thought:
It's well within the structured
confines of a political type to
come up with the idea that
(using facebook here as an
example, let's  say), every
user would be registered
so that whenever they went
on line or hooked into facebook,
ONLY the references for their
town and location would come
up. Completely 'focused' ads,
as they would put it. That sort
of control would be right up their
proverbial (useless) alley. Now,
first-off, all that would be a
travesty because the idea
of the Internet and all its
commerce is to surpass all
'place.' And, contrary to what
the idiots of local politics
proclaim, there is no such
thing as local, as in all their
numb-skull 'buy local' notes,
and they'd be the first to roll
out the welcome mat for the
next mega-front international
manufacture of anything to
situate in their treasured
Palookaville. They're all
about as local as their belt
buckle is to their rear end,
and that's how they
think anyhow.
-
In any case, psychologically,
the dilemma THEY present to
themselves  -  and it's so blatantly
stupid and ignorant that I don't
understand their blind spot  -  is
that of operating in a perplexing
manner and at cross-purposes
with the longings of their minds.
On the one hand, their inner
workings are entreating them
to find that 'spot' of home and
promote it  -  thus all their stupid
efforts at 'This is a great place,
isn't it wonderful here...'  -  and
at the very same time the dirge-
worthy and dark side of them is
at work destroying the very place
they think they are trying to create.
The spinning fantasy they are
trying to manage will never be
managed. Its main components 
are lies, self-delusion, angst,
misrepresentation, and un-realized 
goals and conflicted inner turmoil. 
The psychological  kind of turmoil
that twists people up, that drives 
them mad, makes them go to 
banquets and toasts, have drinks, 
and even beg (firemen boot
in hand). Go figure.
-
All the times I was somewhere
else, I knew I was there. When 
I was in Camden, from the 
seminary, and Blackwood, at 
the seminary, I knew where I 
was. In New York City, I certainly 
did; and in Elmira, and Ithaca 
too. Each of those places
presented a story line that 
one could walk through. There 
were made of veritable layers 
of wallpaper, each layer with 
its encoded and thematic
historical aesthetic. You 
were able  to sense and feel 
the walk-through, learn where 
you were, see the evidences
of the past all around you  -  
the remnants, the stories and 
trails, the layers I mentioned. 
There's nothing of that here;
outside of, maybe, Rahway, or
Perth Amboy's poor versions, 
nearby, you'd be hard-pressed 
to successfully buy into any of
the story-lines that are presented.
There's something in the TV and
entertainment business called
'suspension of disbelief.' The
script writers and film-makers
depend on it. It's the idea that
the viewer will be able to, by
being engrossed and vapid, set
aside their  critical judgement
and 'accept' what they're being 
told, what's being presented to 
them, whatever concocted BS is
presented; that they'll stop asking
themselves, 'how did that book
get on that table with the gun
that's conveniently in the drawer
right where the reader will be
sitting next scene?' And then
the car pulls up with the rescue
guy in it, at just the right moment
to save the scene  -  they won't
say, 'Hey? How that perfect
timing occur? No traffic? No
lights?' That's what is tried here,
falsely dressed in the doilies of
History. And by the way, don't
go digging for any remnants or
relics beneath the Parker Press
building. It wasn't really there.
Just buy into the story, OK.
-
It turns out, in the long run,
that falsity has its value. It 
makes things heroic  -  like all
that greatest generation stuff,
the Apollo and moon landing
projects and the early Mercury
astronauts. In hindsight it all
gets worked over, fictionalized,
turned heroic  -  propagandized.
People buy it all, and with it
create the rest of the things
needed around it. Only then
does it become important and
need to remain as the bulwark of
that which is built on top of it,
I grant you, the wars and the
goals and projects were all
tough and brutal, nasty and harsh.
But they got done within their
confines of a coordinated work
and effort. Once the tasks were
achieved, and after some time
passed, the certain raw memories
faded and things got embellished.
That's then what we begin living
with. It gets taught, and the words
are disseminated. That's how we
get what we live, and what the 
newly arrived come into and are
given as the real history of the
real truth and the true way things
happened. Even if it's just untrue.













No comments: