TURN TO PENNY BUNKUM
She's really a great lady, my favorite kind, the
one I love most, the daughter of mine. Though
I never had one. Always wanted. Life is a
cumbersome life-raft, somehow both pulling you
down as you wear it (it wears you) yet saving
you as well, keeping it all afloat. Otherwise,
what is there anywhere? A Qwik-Smart roadside
stand, an attraction of sodas and malted, a queer
qwid on the edge of his/her own disaster. God,
I can't stand people who can't make up their minds.
I have a ginger-felt hat that I wear; the brim is too
long for the subway; takes up two seats. Plus, I
probably look like some stupid montanero with it
on, singing putrid songs about some highland
farmland, the lass who got away, and the fine,
fresh water of the River Leewon. So, now I
sit next to the electric meters at the side of some
crude cinder-block building dispensing refreshments
in the hundred-degree heat. How has it come to this,
that the State will dispense refreshments for free
to its minions. And who am I? The geek with the
brownie shirt was just making fun of me for
drinking hot coffee. His point seemed to be that,
on a day like today, everything should be cold.
Pretty much like I was to him. Foolscap
head-dress upon all his motivations.
'Wanna' watch a movie? I got one in my car. It's
about a love match between this criminal from Mars -
but no one knows that, of course - and a lady he meets
at the library. They fall in a sort of love and he winds
up in bed with her daughter. Unbeknownst to everyone
anyway, in another time-zone layer, he's already her father
in another family and they raise astral sheep that graze on
the surfaces of hard-stone planets peopled (though you
can't really say 'peopled') or inhabited anyway, by chimerical
beings who want to be present but are not, and cannot be.
It is only vicariously, through imaginings, that they can
exist at all. Something like a dream in our own sleep, but
one which doesn't disappear and you can remember always.
By the time I get around to answering that guy, he's back
in his car with the windows down and the movie is already
playing (I think) on the back of the driver's seat, and, on the
back seat, two kids are intently watching it as he drives away.
While I turn back to Penny Bunkum again;
the daughter I never had.