Tuesday, August 18, 2015

7047. THE PADDED PRICE THE PAUPER PAYS

THE PADDED PRICE 
THE PAUPER PAYS
Two arms in a sling, the large chair taking you in;
watching the carousel horses go 'round. It certainly
does make one feel crippled. The licking tread of 
tandem police  -  two at a time  -  patrol the fairway.
Irish sweepstakes tickets, a cotton-candy stall, and a
place where the girls can kiss balloons. What that's
about, I can't tell. The punk taking the money grins
wicked, while he dispenses blue tickets back.

7046. WALKING THROUGH THE DARK

WALKING THROUGH 
THE DARK
It was on Union Street, in San Francisco, in fact;
I was walking with a guy now dead, who isn't, from
those days. It was dark, fairly late at night, and we were
forging along in the half-cool bay air. He was smoking
a cigarette, and little was said. There were no carnival
rides in those days  -  everything was dead serious. 
-
People who had passed through town, they'd all already 
left, with their little sundry stories to tell, those big cars
they all dragged around in  -  too big, actually for Lombard
Street  - which was a running joke. Probably the only thing
we ever laughed at. The Art Institute and Coit Tower, the
Embarcadero, Fred Martin and Bob Mahaffey, I thought
they were all funny in their way. Get me some coffee.
Get me some Chinese food from Edsel Ford Wong.
-
I had a room at a little, sailor's hotel down by the piers  -  
dim light, no showers, a few women always hanging around.
A couple of southern types lived nearby, always hopping up 
cars with loud pipes and extra carburetion or something.
It was pretty hard even just to get decent coffee  -  late
nights, early mornings, everything just passed.
The guy with the Chinese restaurant,
'Edsel Ford Wong'  -  yeah, that was
really his name.

Monday, August 17, 2015

7045. REMITTANCE

REMITTANCE
We have the backhand, the program, coming.
The three wise men, when they arrive, would now
probably realize only their own shortcomings, and 
we  -  having already been to the moon  -  would 
have more to tell them then they would to us.
The only thing unchanged is time.
-
Here in the broad state of Fieldgold, there is no
ruling class. We simply have gumption, as we push
to the front of the line. Like the woman sitting there,
the one across from me, awaiting probably the same train
I am : she stares ahead, playing with a bauble which hangs
from her neck. Glasses, and a telephone too, of course.
I want to ask her how she's been, but she wouldn't understand.
-
The leaflet boy is coming 'round again : he's peddling cold water,
plastic bottles for one dollar. He volunteers to carry airport bags,
give information on arrivals or departures  -  most anything for that
one hundred cents. I can see his every move, and I do understand.
There is humanity in the grain of his young-man's tree. Good.
-
One time, I was sitting on a crowded train with an Indian fellow
named Prasad. The person next to us began complaining about the
crowding, the heat, the noise, and the rest. Prasad spoke up : 'You 
do not know a crowded train until you have ridden one in my own
country. People stack themselves on the outside, atop the rail cars, 
grasping at anything just to hold on, and the conductors there, they
press in, harshly, all the bodies they can  -  just pushing and cramming
until  -  in these cars  -  going slowly while people are hanging on,
there is almost no longer even any air to breath. You should first 
see that, do you understand, and then you would 
know your own trains here.

7044. WHEN

WHEN
When it's this hot out, me and my friends
(of which there are none ) sit around boozing,
drinking beer and cracking jokes with our feet
up on the patio furniture (of which I have none, nor
a patio). We tell stories, and one guy comes and
another guy goes (no one at all) : of which all
this means, I sit around, alone, sweating.

7043. AND THE GIST OF MY MILL IS ENORMOUS

AND THE GRIST OF MY 
MILL IS ENORMOUS
At first light I am outside taking the air  -  I just walk
and I never sleep. How does that mean for me? The
unpleasantness and atmospheres of a too-saucy day :
the Chinese cooks rubbing their hands in a kitchen
full of roasted meats, the two guys in white caps
stepping out to smoke in their blood-soiled aprons.
I think this is what cities are made for, and what they're
losing now  -  the ratty idea of a Life without end, staying
up all night, just unpleasantness everywhere and seeing
the little, unseemly things as they occur. When everything's
cleaned up, and people just want to life their happy lives,
it's over by then already -  and I'm sorry for that. 
-
I think I'll just stand here alone, and watch that
filthy loft elevator jangle and shake.

7042. A GLOVE WORN BY SOMEONE

A GLOVE WORN BY SOMEONE
Yes, here, it was on the ground, on the roadway -
leather and black and  -  actually  -  quite nice.
The mystery of its story without telling; I stared at
it and just thought. One single glove, in a world
filled with a billion hands working.

7041. PILED UP

PILED UP
You're piled up, like the planes leaving Newark  -  
and where do you go and where are they going?
Any other God-damned thing would have me 
wincing, not caring about Elizabeth  -  that putrid,
piece of shit city with a groin for brains and Mexicans
for pets  -  midget landscapers cutting trees and snickering
as they laugh, wearing enormously beaded Mexican hats,
bigger than colored sombreros, bigger than trucks. Their
corn-fed ladies are midgets too, and husky : four kids
on each hand, and the future of Death they bring on this 
land. My own carriage cart is filled with their dumb lingo.
-
I can't admit to correctness, and this is just the way it is.

7040. ME, WILLING

ME, WILLING
I've got no life; up all the time just writing, laboring
like some frazzled madman over a keyboard dense 
with illogic. I'm stuck in a land I can't get out of
and someone is talking messages to me. Am I as 
nuts as this may seem? Can someone bring me 
juice and food? This is hard-core, non-sentimental
Life Studies work  -  I bring you no fragment just
the whole, entire thing. My luck is in the margins,
where I scribble wandering, broken-hand notes in
a pen which does not write and which only I can see.
And then I realize -  I do not live here at all. My
matter-of-fact handle makes me dislike the
contents of every other cup.

7039. AMERIKA

AMERIKA
This world
is circular.
Everyone 
leaves
their
home. 
Only
some
come
back.

7038. WHAT MAKES MANIFEST NOW

WHAT MAKES MANIFEST NOW
Uncover the circlet and then let me see the
entirety. That eagle you were holding, I thought
was so harmless. The man in the woods said no.
-
If life is a harmonious round, with things running
in and out, I shouldn't have to shoulder this crap.
People sitting around tables, singing. Groups of
chaps together as one. Everything, together.
-
My mind won't recognize this modern day,
and everything grows weary around me.

7037. THE ENTRY-POINT IS EXIT TOO

THE ENTRY-POINT 
IS EXIT TOO
I got up with eyes to boot but crashed into the hallway.
Just like a simple man alone, singing a simple tune at
home. I began thinking again of being very drunk at
Chumley's, when Bobbie would bail me out with
buckets of endless Pale Ale. He'd say that once I
was in there was no better way getting out than by
getting deeper in. India Pale Ale again.
-
Those people from Larchmont  -  snakes and drones
each  -  are huddled around that silly wall jukebox again.
Every tune they pick is gross ; the dairy wall along the
back, as well, is filled with courtly daters drinking and
eating their date. Well I'd guess you know what I mean.
-
I can't talk, even as I think back on this old episode. Did
you not know, Bobbie Beddia is dead? Poor fellow; died
in the Deutsche Bank fire much later, after surviving, right
next door, that entire Twin Towers debacle. What a shame.
Like firemen sometimes say  -  and it all goes to show (and
Bobbie was the best of them), often in order to get out
you just have to go deeper into the flames.

Sunday, August 16, 2015

7036. MY CARAPACE IS MY VIMANA

MY CARAPACE IS MY VIMANA
I'm dying to get out, to break away, to lose 
this frightful, human coil. Oh, you bet then 
too. Not that I wish to go away to somewhere 
else, I just want to see the other side of things; 
like where does that smoke go, or how does 
the light just disappear? And to where? I want 
my giant steps to cross over the fabric-land 
I walk upon. I can fly, like a dream in old man's
cape, like the love note pressed between 
the breasts of some wonderful woman.

7035. EXCULPATORY EXTERMINATION

EXCULPATORY 
EXTERMINATION
Or, get me out of the way. Wipe the lousy slate
clean, shuttle that bus until the banana-boat goes
home. My Victrola needle is stuck in a deadly groove,
won't play, won't move.  Red wine to the rescue, hey!
-
Out in the woods today, 'midst mosquitoes and turtles
and frogs, I met that guy again from Stockton, the one
who paints al fresco in the forest. It actually seems he's
rather boring, based at least on his repeat behavior.
It's not the sort of thing I token to.
-
So I went to the little cafe at the side of the river, and
ordered myself a nice cheese sandwich  -  the little girl 
who brought it to me was lovely, and her name was
Esmeril. I'd never heard that name before either. She
brought me lettuce, and a spare cole slaw.
-
Everything conspired  -  right there, this day  -  to somehow
be calling my name. Some dowager with money strolled by,
said something nice to me, and stayed awhile  -  claiming to
be 'out strolling for the luxury of buying things I want.'
Well, hello then, how-di-do. Ten minutes later, she
was gone and my impression was too.
-
If a riverboat came by while I was sitting there, yes, I 
would have jumped aboard. As it is, no, no one uses the
river anymore  -  except scalawags fishing and dumping 
their catch  -  which more than likely happens to be
shoes and lumber and kitchen waste. Over there,
sitting on  a large rock, two lovers contesting
each other. Ah, to be that young again!

7034. I AM HOPEFUL

I AM HOPEFUL
I am always hopeful the lost shall be found
and brought home. I am hopeful the light
will break through the dark. It is just my way.
If I am alone, I  -  even then  -  do not think that
really I am that alone. There are a hundred million
others, just like me. This I know to be.

7033. 51 east 71

51 east 71
In the constant way of beseeching others that comes
from altar boy and bullshit service, I look about me
for a trace of God. All his minions, yes, they're
everywhere I can see  -  but not Him or what 'He'
could be. The name's unimportant. We can call it 
'Fred'.  So I start a little story here, even without
a pen to write it down as I walk along. "Fred, now
what the hell did you go and do that for, who needed
that crippled woman there? Her back is twisted, she
looks like a beggar and  - as she walks  - I see she 
mostly only looks at the ground because of the
twisted hump of her really sad back. The limp of
having two different length legs, what the hell
sort of a joke was that? Fred, I feel for this lady, 
don't you? It hurts just looking. It's Summer now,
you did okay there, thought the heat's sometimes
too much  -  long days, nice nights, yeah. But what's
this lady do in the Winter, thanks to you? She has
to huddle, find shelter, take the abuse of others in
finding warm places to stay, or die  -  frozen to a
particle of numbness, ice-snot out her nose. Fred,
how could you, and is this the way it really goes?
(Or don't you know what it's like?)...

7032. RADIANT HOUSES

RADIANT HOUSES
I love the success of others : all those radiant houses
and homes wherein successful dreams dwell  -  the
things brokered by daring and sweat. The guy with
the thirteen cars and the extra garage he had to have
built to house his big collection, and his wife, Helen
Eddy, with her constant compulsion for happiness chores.
I know it's not ever for me, any of this good fortune. I've
failed at even putting models together  -  all that Revell
stuff with glue slobbed everywhere. Like one of those
Potemkin homes with pasted over windows, that's me.
Boarded up grossness covered by sticky paper happy
flowers. What's the difference if I walk or ride: 
going nowhere either way.

Saturday, August 15, 2015

7031. PET NAMES

PET NAMES
They call this Earth and the interest on the land
they call that wage indenture. The things you have 
to do for others, they call that responsibility. Though
I'll never know why, it's something we live with. Like
having a tunnel for a car to go through, or having a
special place where only planes can land. I can't
quite figure it out, but that's the way things are.

7030. MARKMANSHIP IS BETTER THAN DOPE

MARKSMANSHIP IS 
BETTER THAN DOPE
A guy told me today I look 'shredded.' I had no idea
what he meant. I think maybe he meant wasted, tired
out, battered, worn? I don't know. But then he said, 
'that's a good thing, you know. I envy you.' Hadn't a
clue. He's an alright guy, someone I see maybe ten or 
fifteen times a year  -  young, Russian guy with a
power-washing business, going great guns. His
wife's family has money  -  he says they're always
looking for new ideas to invest in and he thinks I could
 be his idea man, the guy he's been looking for. He
swears he'll cut me in if anything ever goes. So,
I throw him ideas, yeah  -  probably just wasting
my ideas, which he'll steal and never tell me.
-
Like the cigarette lighter that can tell you who your
mate is with and why at any time. Now there's a really
dynamite idea. He thought. (I think his wife's fooling
around on him, which is why I made it up. Knew he'd 
bite). But seriously, really, here's the one I told him
today: serious, 'vitamin' water for dogs. Fortified
canine water. Think of it : no one makes anything like
it. Even in dog stores, there's never an aisle for dog water
like there is for people water in supermarkets and such. 
People are always fussing over their dogs, 'only the best',
getting all proud and haughty over Fido and his needs.
-
This can let them say regular water's just not good enough.
Fortified canine water, with energy and health essentials, 
for only the pampered and only the best! Yes? Yes!
They'd buy it by the cartload, especially if the
BS factor is done right and gets high enough.
Call me. Send me a check, ok?

7029. COFFEE IN THE BREEZEWAY

COFFEE IN THE 
BREEZEWAY
Quick, make it work, before he gets home again.
Sit with your back to the wall, and stay quiet. You
know, you've done it again  -  this time it's Super Glue
in your hair! How did you ever do that? Well, no matter,
I'm pretty sure this nail polish remover will do the trick.
Although it smells, at least it smells like ladies.
-
Well, if you must know, I was putting together a painting, 
and the outside frame wood kept falling off, so I decided to
glue it using that  -  and when my hair fell into my eyes
(reason I usually wear a cap) first thing I did was, yes,
use my hand to brush it back and that hand, in turn, I
brushed over some fresh-glued area, and transferred it.
-
Oh well, what's it matter, I mean otherwise what a mess
everything could be, everywhere. Nothing ever really
works right, you know  -  look at the space program, or
those countries with nuclear programs, for instance  -
not often but eventually, something's always blowing up.
Glue in your hair? Nothing. We'll fix it up.

7028. AN UNPREDICTABLE BRICK THROWN AT A NON EXISTENT WINDOW

AN UNPREDICTABLE 
BRICK THROWN AT A
NON-EXISTENT WINDOW
The sun is in my eyes, blindingly. I cannot
see a thing. What a way is that to grab attention?
Ammunition like a powder gun could be coming
over that hilltop and I wouldn't see it. Tanks and
munitions, or a herd of elephants. Is it legal to force
a blind? Here's a situation, right and high.
-
Ancients worshipped the sky.
We seem to think we worship
now something in it instead. 

Friday, August 14, 2015

7027. TEACHING ACTING, OR ACTING AT TEACHING?

TEACHING ACTING, OR 
ACTING AT TEACHING?
They say absurdity is stranger than truth; 
well, OK. I always thought it was stranger 
than fiction, or is that the truth?

7026. YOU'D BETTER

YOU'D BETTER
You'd better start waking the shirt-fitter, and
walking the wheelbarrow home. I can tell it's 
to be one of those days. I haven't been to New 
York City in a really long time. Last time I
was here, the Twin Towers still stood  - sitting
at the Nancy Whiskey Pub, just looking downtown,
I got drunk as a skunk and left a camera there.
Then there was the time the two guys tried
playing shuffleboard but got into a fight
and it went nowhere. A few dumb punches,
one guy did lose a tooth, but I think it was
a fake tooth from a plate he had, not an
actual real tooth. Does that count?

7025. SOMEONE'S ALWAYS LISTENING

SOMEONE'S ALWAYS 
LISTENING
Four voices, unaccompanied, are singing old 
American hymns, and I love the sound of the 
sound I hear. I am a wayfaring stranger on my
journey home like Noah's weary dove or the
wagoner's lad at the mercy-seat pleading 'Saviour'
at the shining shore seeking the green pasture
and a saint's delight just over in Gloryland.
(I've got my lament where we'll never grow old).

7024. A LIGHTNESS LIKE LOVE

A LIGHTNESS LIKE LOVE
Man, I'm in hock for my soul to the devil;
well, it sometimes seems, anyway. We've lost
our junked Rolls Royce; at the corner it's gone,
no longer there, vanished without a chauffeur driving.
And, yes, I've thought about all this a very long time :
this modern age putrefies. I was far better off before
computers and laptops punched me in the face like this;
all that waiting for things, photos and films and sound.
The letter before the letter after; have I read this or should
I just keep it hidden? And I don't even know your name.
-
What really keeps my going is the strength of adhesion
that I have for this world I've entered. A long time ago I
was the path-man for the master at the portal, and, yes,
He (or whatever it was) let me through, smiling.

7023. IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING AND I'M SICK OF SOMETHING

IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING 
AND I'M SICK OF SOMETHING
Did I ever lend you a hat? I forget.
Is that Procul Harem on the oven top?
What are they doing here now? This
carpenter says he can fit into the
microwave if you'd just let him.
-
It's already tomorrow, and I haven't even
enjoyed today  -  and now there are three
Jehovah's at the door. Witnessing, I guess,
with their little paper pamphlets. Yes, yes,
I want to draw from Heaven like a well.
-
I like the girl next door, she's cute, but young.
However, even her mother carries the torch pretty
well. Did I ever lend you a hat? I forget.

7022. JESUS JACOB

JESUS JACOB
Jesus, Jacob, it's almost Saturday again and
all those people and families are already on
their ways to somewhere  -  their Jersey shore
or their mountains pure  -  the Drolls, the Glibs, 
and the Stupids. I'm pretty sure you've met them
all. There they are, sitting behind glass in their cars.
I think they sully so what they intensely touch.

7021. TWO-PRONGED UNICORN

TWO-PRONGED UNICORN
I'm in the shade standing in the sun off to one side
of the landing. Nearby, there's a golden girl roasting 
peppers on a grill  -  nothing to do with me, but I can
see. These little Village backyards, the run into each 
other, and people tend to mingle grandly here  -  the
flaming gay guy with his trendy fedora and the friends
of his all from the theater. Maybe Cherry Lane people,
Lucille Lortel people, I don't know. Christopher Street
guns me down. The brownstone off to the side has a
hedge-fund guy about 50 and his girlfriend about 15; so
much fun in Desiree Canyon I'm sure. Twisted. On the
side of the building, near the rear, is some sort of old
brick-oven thing built into the masonry, like a bread
or pizza over maybe, from way back when. Curious.
They just use it now for wine, storing bottles in a
dark, cool place. It guess it makes good sense. The
other guy, again, the one with the fedora, is telling
his friend he 'only drinks Creme de Menthe from
terra cotta cups'. I want to cut him short and say
I've heard that line before, from a movie or a
play or a song, but I don't, and I just let 
them play along. Their simplistic
conversation is fun to hear.

Thursday, August 13, 2015

7020. BLOOD FUED

BLOOD FUED
Here you go, pucker face; oh I hate your entire
family -  those hicks and those constables too.
Your moonshining cousins and that crazy aunt
who died in the coal-mine collapse at Mt. Yielding.
That uncle you had with the gun in the car, always
yelling at the top of his lungs. Just as much, I can 
remember that grandfather you claimed, the one
with the straw hat and but a few teeth left, always
going on about Roosevelt, or whoever that was
who electrified his god-damned valley.
-
You showed me once where your second cousin
was buried, the one who somehow had managed
to marry your aunt while still being married to his
own distant cousin from Wallaway Springs  -  he got
shot in the head by one of your Hackstein twins, and
they tried burying him ass-up. Remember that guy?
On his grave, their version of the eternal flame (oh I
well remember) was leaving a twenty-nine cent Bic
lighter on the stone. I still laugh at that one.
-
Anyway, if ever a documentary needs doing on the
family from Hell, I really think you ought to step up.
Volunteer the whole raft of losers; they'll all
look good on camera.

7019. I WILL ALWAYS BE THE ONE

I WILL ALWAYS BE THE ONE
Until I am wheelchair bound, I guess, I will
always be the one to come and go at my own choosing,
to wander those 'chartered' streets at will, spin a coin
of my own fine minting, watch the cloudings seeding.
Never much a one for chains and locks, I wouldn't much
care who else comes and goes, just to be sure there's room,
lots of places for those elbows  -  stretch and hit and roam.
I can be lost in my finding, I can be straight in my curves;
here today, then gone tomorrow, as those sayings go.
Otherwise, you see, I'm fairly useless and hate the maw
of mankind's ways : employment sucks, and paychecks
have that scratch and sniff aroma I can't stand. People
who value money throwing it off to those who value 
it more? Trade time for money, what a joke, over 
all this land. I will always be the one with an 
aptitude for getting lost, for setting out, and  - 
 just as much, perhaps  -  not returning back.

7018. GOD

GOD
You'd better get cracking, giant one.
You really ought to get a move on now.
Pop a few volcanoes open, spew a little
venom here. Seize this earth and crack 
it open. That will shut them up for a while.
-
You should really act in service, big one.
Etch on some granite slabs something we
all can read  -  televise your institution, or
at least show us where you live  -  your kitchen
habits and all your garden implementations.
-
Face it man, we're lost without you.
Why'd you go and disappear?
Have you not written a diet
or a cooking book for us
to see down here?

7017. GRACIOUS IN THE QUIET

GRACIOUS IN THE QUIET
There are places now where I've not gone in  a long time.
The waters by that 'other' canal, the grounds of the university
where I used to lounge, the chartered oak near where once
colonial soldiers were felled and George Washington drank
from the spring. True, I appreciate the quiet, but they each
have their surface noises which I miss as well. I used to like
to sit in the rounded hall with all those windows and wood,
a library from far days back. Now I do not at all. I am
gracious in the quiet as it sets me to thinking.
-
Let me again go over to Chancellor Green and have a seat.
The mornings are very nice, and those grand trees are calling.

7016. CRUMBLES

CRUMBLES
Everything crumbles :
I am left with dust. 

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

7015. FOUR FLAGS OVER THE LOOP INN

FOUR FLAGS OVER 
THE LOOP INN
I look up as I pass; a hot-sheet motel, a roadside
sex attraction, the jungle room, don't forget. It flies
four flags atop its roofside atrium. Four fine American
flags, like they all should be? Now there's a sight to see.
(I guess that clinches the case for me)

7014. INTERVIEWING THE OLD GUY AGAIN

INTERVIEWING THE 
OLD GUY AGAIN
Are you in good health? Do you feel you're a
ghoul? Have any defenders come for to help you?
Will you restate what it is you said last week? Are
they treating you kindly? Feeding you? Are they
taking care for you, and how long do you think you
can last? Is this action to be your last resort and  -  if
not  -  is your own death or suicide an option? Have you
ever read Yukio Mishima? Are you religiously inclined?
Do you feel yourself exceptional? Are you sure you're right?

7013. BUTTON TAG IN CLEARVIEW HELL

BUTTON TAG IN 
CLEARVIEW HELL
Well, then, pardner. You are what you are and,
what is this, some suburban inferno we're stuck
in? Clearview, they say? Hell no. Even the barber
shop has an opinion here; the fires and flames are
licking the piers, and all the young kids wear naval
piercings and wrong tattoos.  Whatever shall be done?
Pass the laws for long-sleeve shirts, headwraps and
bubblegum  -  make 'em sure, each one, of what they're
doing and tell them we don't tolerate no new infractions.
No more make-out joints and no more chewing. Got that?
-
I just went down today to see that railroad trestle, and now
everyone's writ their names in blood and lipstick. No way
is that to stay. I don't care who disagrees, I'm the Sheriff
around here you hear? I'll run them out of town, all of 'em,
on a rail then if I have to. And I wouldn't care none their
mamas and daddies. They know it. Gotta' be a crystal-clear
reflection of this place in every piece of water. We want
goal, and we want business, and now and how. 
I'm not playing any button-tag here.

7012. DINOSAUR WORLD

DINOSAUR WORLD 
Oh my, they're back again  -  those surreptitious,
friendless things. Eating leaves off trees and stripping
bark, tromping and chomping along. Would that some
gardener now would see them. Like luggage at an
airport strip  -  piled high and waiting  -  these huge
beasts of things amass. Whatever shall we do! We
thought we were rid of them! Not even two by two,
just one at a time enough, they prance and mangle.
I cannot now ever close my eyes but see them still.

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

7011. NO FUN

NO FUN
It's three-thirty, after the lunch I never eat;
I'm watching this hammer gore down the nail.
If I were carpenter, and you were a lady. Blah,
the rest. The room I'm in has one orange wall  -
I don't know why. Some guy in the other place
is singing memories like Mario Lanza, and his
idea of modernity is to skip every other note.
It's his version, he says, of what 'hip-hop' is
really about. Trouble is, for him, I don't give
a rat's ass  -  a fuck  -  a troubadour's wig  - 
a fig-tree's flame. See what I mean? This
place I passed today had a '55 Packard parked
in the window, for sale. Nice, smooth tan color,
 and the rest. I don't know the price, but I should
have taken it and it'll be gone tomorrow. How much 
you wanna' bet? I love those old cars  -  you can really
mess with the owners, because there was no lock-out
on the hood. Just go there, flip the hood up. pull the
writes from the distributor cap and then put them all
back in randomly  -  it'll never start again. They had 
particular sequences, the cylinder codes were etched 
into the block  -  firing sequence, like, for an eight-
cylinder, which this probably was, it would say, '3, 7
2, 4, 1, 5, 6.' But unless you knew that you were lost.
The guy would be stranded for hours. Nowadays you
can't do that stuff, because the hood latch opens from
inside only, and there's no distributor in there  -  and
it's all computer code and plug-in diagnostic anyway.

7010. INCANDESCENT FILMSTRIPS

INCANDESCENT FILMSTRIPS
I have walked away with the canisters they said these things
were in. The UPS guy, Dave, said it was okay. He delivers films
to the movie house every two weeks but says that will soon be
stopping since they're going digital. Or something. Something
I can never care about. I hate actors and movies and starlets
and fakery. I can't believe for shit. You're telling me that's a
New York street, I'm telling you it's a Main Street set. And
the special effects just make me barf. 'Any actress worth her 
shit, all she has to do is show her tits.' Can you believe some 
beefsteak Jewboy producer actually said that to me? Yeah,
at Annals Film Retrieval company, on  37th street. He was
sitting there with his fat ass on a stool watching a re-wind of
some porno flick while smoking his big cigar. I knew what 
he meant, right off the bat  -  it wasn't very hard, I mean
difficult. Such a schmuck this guy was, believe me, if I 
was a moyel I'd have gladly taken off his head.

7009. CHANCE ACCOLADES

CHANCE ACCOLADES
I take chance accolades and get away with them all,
like a miser in a free-run bank, I horde even that which
I cannot take : read me your sunshine, I write this fast.
Give me one idea, I can make it five before you blink;
separate the good things from the bad, and you'll see
they equal out  -  and it's all in one pile anyway. Why
else do you think there are churches and jails? Same in
as same out. Like the computer geeks say : GIGO.
-
I walked into Woolworth's wearing boxing gloves but
trying to carry a harmonica too. That's a pretty hard
thing to do  -  you try it some day.

7008. THAT'S NOT ALL OF IT

THAT'S NOT ALL OF IT
And this is a chocolate raft filled with buried memories  -  
where the candy-canes went to hide. Who looked under
the bed? Where did the werewolves go? For one small
person I have a lot of shadows following me. Every different
angle there is can be found in this shade. And that's only part 
of what I'm saying. My goal is to be a God. Is that OK with you?

Monday, August 10, 2015

7007. WE CROSS THE ANTICS WITH LEISURE TIME

WE CROSS THE ANTICS 
WITH LEISURE TIME
And then what? So, like babies, we kiss and make up?
Or I let you tell me about the other guys you're seeing,
where you go, who they are and what they do? Not too
thankful for any of that, thanks. I wear your red scarf,
just to see what it feels like, and five guys want me to
go with them. So soon? I feel like Lance Loud in an
episode from Hell. I'm as confused as the next guy.
-
You hand me a book of libels, and tell me it's a big
seller at Saks. I look at it and say, 'I only read books
which were bought at Scribners.' Dead-locked, like a
check-mate at some park chess-table, we go nowhere.
-
If it's right it's right. You'd know what I want, what drink
to order. I'd know all your sizes and the things you like the
best. We'd cuddle and kiss, and make up the rest. 'That's the
only kiss and make up I like,' you say. Oh, how funny is that!

7006. ON THE WINGS OF A DOVE

ON THE WINGS OF A DOVE
I can get it all done. I can finish what
I've started : nail the house to the shutters.
If I have to, I'll do it that way. Ass-backwards 
or not. There's no sensation like waiting for time.

7005. TOWARDS LIFE IS TOWARDS DEATH

TOWARDS LIFE IS 
TOWARDS DEATH
They all run together, and how can I talk to you,
you never stop to listen and your concerns are somewhere
else. This is my intention  -  I might as well say it now  -  
to outlast this malarkey until the grave is shut. There's
never a final shovel-full to be for me : I'll keep pushing
back the bastard lid until it cracks. You'll see.
-
Think if I was a turkey somewhere, on some lame-ass turkey
farm, and it was getting to be near mid-October : you know damn
well I'd know what was up, what was coming, what was about to
happen. My wattle would be moving, my legs escaping fast. But!
Nowhere to go, old fellow, nowhere not at all. The November
freezer beckons. Thanksgiving every year! Well, see it's the same.
-
I'm creased and I'm hammered, and I'm stuck, and I'm scared.
I'm reluctant and angry, and don't want to move a muscle or
take a breath. Living this stuff is every day, and  -  always  -  
towards life is towards death.