7004. ALL MINDS ARE ALL THE SAME

ALL MINDS ARE 

ALL THE SAME

The red convertible went spinning by in a funnel-made

muddle of its own transition : speed, sound, and pride.

'Not everyone can drive one of these,' it seemed to say.

Not that I cared. My straw-hat represented my heart, a

hayseed sitting on a bale. I turned to my Uncle, and asked,

'Uncle Bren, what does it mean when someone gets cheated?'

-

I should have known he would never answer. He said something

about what time was lunch and what did my mother say to do.

An answer as long as a geezer's last breath, I figured.

-

Probably it's like that when you're a kid : nothing stands, and not

much makes sense, adults seem to be troubled, confusion rules,

and the only thing really sure is the rain when it's falling, or that

sandwich in your hands  -  which you probably didn't really want

anyway. Another tired afternoon, and the sun beating down.

-

I tried inflections, I tried changing my voice, I tried speaking in

some other language. Personal stuff no one else could understand.

No good, they all just got madder than a coon chased by a dog.

Seems like everything's the same when you're bored, all minds

are all alike. Sometimes I just wished I was already dead.

7003. MY IDEAL, INVETERATE LOSER

MY IDEAL, INVETERATE LOSER

Outside of Charles Bukowski  -  what a flim-flam

huckster he  -  it would have to be me. He said :

"Now I don't know what I'm talking about anymore. 

That's the danger of talking  -  you talk, talk, talk,

all wax and wallow, and pretty soon you don't know

what you're saying. I don't. That's why I feel much

better when I am mostly quiet." OK, that's good;

I can live in that neighborhood.

7002. A MIRACLE ON EVERY CORNER

A MIRACLE ON 

EVERY CORNER

There's a miracle on every corner:

that guy just walked through a wall,

that girl started a fire with her eyes.

7001. ALL THE SAME

ALL THE SAME

Time moves.

The days bend.

The hours stretch.

It's all the same.

Time moves.

7000. GOING ALL OUT

GOING ALL OUT

A flotilla of land mines was coming my way  -  I

knew it, I could smell it, I could sense the world

off-center. Whether it was by land or sea, I knew

the format of our whole existence was about to 

change. Whatever it was to be, I had to see.

-

There's only one factor in all of this illusion; that

factor is necessity. We simply 'need' certain things

to be, to square off our beings and to make 'reality'

have sense  -  for every one of our 'up's, there needs to

be a down, for an open, a closed, for a square, a circle.

There's no other way and it was all pre-ordained. It is 

simply the order of the way things are. You can fight

this all day long, and as long as you wish, but it cannot

change. The right angle which makes the corner, it's

the same right angle which then supports the house.

-

Life is so simple, when it's unified.

6999. HIGH TIME, JESSAMINE

HIGH TIME, JESSAMINE

When we were in school together, you never

talked. Now all you do is ramble. I can't

figure out the reasons for your stuff; maybe

you can tell me. It's high time, Jessamine.

You go around telling people what I've done :

yeah, it's mostly all true, but so what of it.

And I never did anything like that to you  -

so why all the bother about it now?  Soon

you better tell me. It's high time, Jessamine.

6998. HOW I'D LIKE TO CIRCUMNAVIGATE THE GLOBE

HOW I'D LIKE TO 

CIRCUMNAVIGATE 

THE GLOBE

In dreams. On stilts. Fast-walking. Like Hannibal even,

riding an elephant across the Island of Elephantine. 

It's by Egypt, you know; seldom seen. What brought

that up, right now, anyway, I can't say. I heard about

in a crummy song long, long ago.

-

No matter. The Buddhist guy, he was pretty funny, when

he used to say things like : 'wherever you go, there you are.'

Cosmic riddle bullshit, zen koan, one-hand clapping and all.

Thich Nhat Hanh, or something like that. I think he's dead now.

6997. SINGULAR LAKESIDE EFFECT

SINGULAR 

LAKESIDE 

EFFECT

Blue crystal, that lamp is shining in a reflected

sunlight now narrowing down. It is nearing 8pm,

on another Summer night. I feel as if I've not been

outside all day, though I have. Some lady, with a 

cigarette, is  nursing coffee. (Yes, there are some 

who still smoke). It's a quaint scene, for me  -  I 

watch that curl of smoke arise after each inhale-breath 

she takes. It's like silence, twirling about; 

or the sound that silence makes.

-

Before too long, another 20 minutes have passed, and 

she is gone. I try to think of other friends, but I cannot,

really, for I have none. I am alone, and stiff, and still.

6996. LET'S BE ALIVE UNTIL NO LONGER

LET'S BE ALIVE

UNTIL NO LONGER

How a goat will chew anything, and a cow will

chew cud, and a pig will run rampant through

mud  -  so too do I hate mornings, and afternoons,

and evenings too. The glum charade of party-poopers

and the ribald floats of goons. Attack me now then, if

you must, for I smell already the bananas which have

ripened on the table in  the sun. I've found another

pen I thought was lost. I have my notebook, and 

I'm on the run. Let me capture what I may in words.

-

Look at this! Look! They've parked their jagged cars

upon the grass and meadows. They've set up once again

their rugged bandstands for the party, which will tramp 

the Summer grasses and twist and bend the young trees.

Saplings, like the students soon to enter here again, are

once-over bent, and twisted, torn, and stripped. A week

later, the bestial ground-crews with all their noise and

danger, will try to set it straight. Oh how I hate this

organized muck as well.

-

Let's taste the beers. Let's get as drunk as flirty coeds.

Lets douse this awful world in chimes and colors like

a grand cathedral with its flowers. Let's cover every

doubt with a new and different sort of bald deceit.

Let's be alive until we can no longer be.

6995. MARY LOU

MARY LOU

I might as well tell you know, I know where

your kin lie buried; all the graves are cornerstones

and every etching's been wiped clean by the master.

I hope you don't forget what each one said, for we

have to set repairs and someday make new stones 

for each. I don't know what happened, but in that 

last rioting which took this crummy town, the place

was overrun with looters dropping off their goods.

They left things there a while, went out again for

more, and later came and took it all away  -  one by

one and piece by piece. Now all these shacks in the

fenlands, even the junkiest ones, have new TVs and

grand refrigerators and the people wear shirts and

collars. Yes. Good? But the cemetery's been left

a wreck, and we must all re-bury the dead. I

guess if God was a pauper, he'd be

living here too, Mary Lou.

6994. TENDENCIES

TENDENCIES

This broad channel is enough to drown a cat, sink

a dog, and suffocate a barnload of cows. Watch out,

please! Things will always fall where they may. Binx 

said, about life, 'there is only one thing I can do  -  

listen to people, see how they stick themselves into

the world, hand them along a ways in their dark

journey, and be handed along.' Walker Percy

had it right. It's the dark things that really

make us free and happy 'midst others.

6993. 'YOUR WHIPLASH PUNCH IS AN AGELESS HUNCH

YOUR WHIPLASH PUNCH IS 

AN AGELESS HUNCH

And I am remembering to watch things go 

far away as I descend into space. Officer Joe 

Bolton, come help me now. And then I realize,

just as well, that in space one doesn't really

descend, or ascend. So how's all that go? And

this Jesus fellow, going up? Did it not look like

going down, on the other side of the Earth? Or

did they not see this? Officer Joe Bolton,

come help me now.

6992. CHARLIE HAS A WATERFALL

CHARLIE HAS 

A WATERFALL

Look at this, it's ten o'clock already  -  the

badger has a keen, and the lifeline has a

medal. Five young boy scouts long ago

undid their tent. In a few hours, all those

fathers with their generous cars will be

piling back up the hill to pick up their 

camping-trip boys. And take them home.

Having learned how to play with matches.

Having learned how to make fire. In my 

own day, we'd huddle in the tent with

flashlights and forbidden magazines;

now they alone have phones yet allowed?

The backpack becomes too heavy to walk 

with  -  like some Civil War oath, they 

must swear to each other that only 

their servants will carry their bags.

6991. WHERE DID YOU RING IN THE NEW YEAR?

WHERE DID YOU RING 

IN THE NEW YEAR?

One miserable bunch of matches on the table  - 

this funny guy told me that's his best pick-up 

line ever, but it only works until like February 

first. I said, 'Yeah, people forget quickly.'

-

Anyone worth their mettle wouldn't remember

anyway where they were on New Year's Eve.

'I was having too much of a good time to watch

time good.' Oh, man, what a wasted bunch.

-

Through the side door come five or six bikers  -  the

real kind, not the fakes. It used to get like this too, at

Red Rocks on the westside  -  late at night, little contests

set up with guys at the door  -  who's wearing what support

shirts, and who's riding what. A real bunch of dicks.

-

They move onto the front of the bar, and just take it over.

Drinking Budweiser over and over. I watch the biggest guy

complaining, there's no room for his elbows. A cop parks

out front, but nobody cares. Nobody cares at all.

6990. 'GO OUT, AND MEET PEOPLE'

'GO OUT, AND MEET PEOPLE'

The doctor said I had Mumps and I 

had Shingles. 'Mingles', he called it. 

Then he said  -  'take two aspirin, 

and go out and meet people.'

6989. SINGLE SERVICE GUIDANCE

SINGLE SERVICE GUIDANCE

Each time the world comes around  -  to knock or to

kneel at my doorstep again  -  I am ready. The odd

soundings of all the ages come with it : I am sheepishly

involved in something. Flowers which give hands to the

many days of memory  -  everything and each place I

used to be I still can see. 

-

Please forgive me if I do not regret  -  the shimmer of

childhood lingers on the bottom step of this porch of

now. I knock, and it knocks back. I step down, and  -

yes  -  it lets me in. Every nuance the same, yet each

nuance different  :  like I know the song but forget

the tune; or recall the tune but forget the song.

-

(Has it been that long?)...

6988. CAN I CALL YOU NOW?

CAN I CALL YOU NOW?

Standing at the edge of the sea, oh great ship

rolling by, do you see me? I see you clearly,

but what is that pirate flag atop your ancient 

mast? How have I been transported; I thought 

this was the East River. I've stood here some

thousand times, Sutton Place and all the rest,

watching barges and tugs and the rich craft

of stockbroker millionaires go sidling by me.

Now, this? How is it come to pass, and here?

-

A few days ago, I was in a modern office, signing

a paper and getting a check  -  something about a

contract worth thousands and more. I haven't looked

back since and do not know a thing  -  yea, but now 

all is lost again. I am stranded on some other old 

and distant shore? I want new muscle, and more.

-

The faggy guy behind the desk  -  his name was, so

typical, Colebert Fenster,  -  said I could make millions 

with my words, and they could turn people's hearts

and maybe alter the world. Well, damn it all, they

did. Now  -  so changed  -  I'm stuck here watching

a fucking pirate ship go pumping down a river?

What? I want this all in replay, I wish to go 

backwards. again. (I know I should never have

shaken that limp-wristed peapod's hand at all).

-

Give me that desk job once more, at the museum.

I can preen like a girl and pretend I am rich.

6987. ON THE SHELVES OF ABANDON

ON THE SHELVES 

OF ABANDON

No, no, I'm not innocent at all  -  so far 

beyond guilt I was born before the Fall. 

I held that apple when it was but a seed. 

Figure that out, and get back to me later.

6986. I HAVE BEEN BOUGHT

I HAVE BEEN BOUGHT

I have been bought with the love of the universe

in my heart and mind  -  no, you may not think so,

but it is so. I stand enthralled by everything I see:

turtle love, the lily-pad pond, and all the rest. So

strenuous, all this, myself I cannot rest. My time

-  being of essence here  -  is all the test. 

6985. PUT YOUR TWENTY-NINE

PUT YOUR TWENTY-NINE

Like a conference at Breadloaf, I only hear heavy

words which beat down other heavy words and

theories. Ideas. The thoughts that all men configure

when they've stayed too long at school. Give me

your twenty-nine fingers, put them on this table. I

will watch how your reflexes work : trying not to

think too hard. My dog sleeps on the patio. I stand

here in the hall. The telephone still on the wall just

rang  -  what I garnered was that some Indian guy 

wants me very badly to install solar roof panels from

his company, or the company for which he's calling.

I said 'Yes, thank you, I already did, I'll take two,

 you should have my payment by now already. I 

sent it yesterday.' All he did was break down into

laughter, and try to maintain his cool, He called

my by my name, the name he had for me, in his

curious pronunciation between laughs. It was 

quite the moment, for us everywhere, all.

6984. CAN I STILL CALL THIS A MANDOLIN?

CAN I STILL CALL THIS 

A MANDOLIN?

I am drinking heavily again and my words are

as slurred as my thoughts -   sitting here like a beast

playing music. I have to listen to pigs -  all these

bar-sorts, sitting around in their cantankerous marmalades

and off-beat sweetened fuck-drinks. The women want to be 

women and they're better than men, they say  -  best of all.

Being equal 'that's the easy part, you dog-faced whomp.'

She actually said that to me; bitch.

- 

All I wanted to do was put my leg up and fart  -  maybe 

challenge her, one to one. 'Equal this, you Equalizer Fat 

Bunny!' And then let a series rip. I figured (in a burp, 

'bring me another!') she'd either match me or run. So,

oh, what? Then, anyway, they keep talking about 'equal',

how they want things in their offices to be, set-up with

equal opportunity. I call out instead, pretty wobbly, 'I

don't care 'bout that, let's talk about your orifices instead.'

I wonder   -   'Did I already porter another order? I mean,

order another Porter.' Oh, shit. Hey, lady, c'mere  -  

'can I still call this a 'mandolin'?'

6983. GRAIN FIELDS

GRAIN FIELDS

The wonderful oasis is always shedding product -

we live in a fierce abundance. Existing for now,

the needs we have met are the needs we've handled  - 

the needs we don't yet know shall be the ones that

get us down. I am a nettlesome fellow.

I get under people's skin.

6982. LIFE HAS BEEN SHUT

LIFE HAS BEEN SHUT

This life has been shut to me, closed and

beyond all meaning  -  the torn-off advertising

banner tells me nothing now, only the marks

and the bleatings of individual man. Crazy folk,

incessant upon leaving marks. Signatories to the

note of no return. Lost warriors on a field of battle.

-

Above my head, the fourteen floors of windows and

a yellow building painted to look like steam; a cloud

pattern of flow and ebb, things reflected in old windows.

I can't see the forest for the trees  -  no, that's wrong. I

can't see a thing at all. Plus, I am weary so, of all these

encountered urgings. Buy. Sell. Get. Have.

-

Give me the pantaloons of some Christopher Columbus

instead, urging new lands for the Queen and the King.

Taking precious moments to pray, seeking the romantic

virgin in the deep, dark forest of a new, enticing world.

Oh, would that it were like that; it wasn't. Even he was

after better ways to get the gold and spices, find the

trade-route never found, catch all that lucre in the

ground, 'bring home the bacon' that he'd found.

6981. I DO SWEAR

I DO SWEAR

I do swear, sometimes you're really pretty lovely.

Little turned up nose, those perky blue eyes, that

lithesome quality I can't quantify. Sitting by the

water, just watching it blur, you remind me of a

fantasy story, something about queens and old-time

lancers and their quests. And then  -  right past you  -  

come these two other girls from somewhere else, 

yapping and doing their double-talk prance along

the black-hot Summer pavement. Yes, the modern

day intrudes again, and I can't find anything good 

in it. They disappear in a blur, like sluts in a

modern movie.

6980. HARMONIA WILLINGBORO

HARMONIA WILLINGBORO

I knew her brother Frankie, before he died. 

Had a nice job in Columbus, Ohio, and he repaired

watches on the side. Had a job in the Governor's

office, as a bookkeeper for the Labor Department.

I never thought  -  he'd have been the last  -  that

someone like him would end up in prison.

-

When they brought him in for arraingnment, you

know, all those cameras, reporters, and him in wrist

shackles, it was sad. We all watched the TV anyway

that night, just to see what he'd say. Nothing.

- 

Never found out the whole story : two weeks later he

was dead. In his yard, on bail by then, someone came

in through the back fence  -  one of those tall, white, 

wide ones  -  while he was mowing or hosing or something

distracting. Put two bullets in his head, like that. He was

gone, immediately  -  and I guess so was whatever info

he had that could be traded off for reduced charges, or

whatever all that is. Someone, or group, I suppose,

sure really didn't want him to talk.

-

Ohio mob, all that Prendergast stuff, those hoodlums

running their grafts and corruptions. Oh well, Harmonia,

it's over and done, and he's better off dead. hate to say it,

yeah, but he's better off dead.

6979. OFFAL

OFFAL

Sweep the mess from off the floor and drag

that carcass away : cows and pigs and goats.

Halal to Kosher to Awful to me.

6978. THE WEISENHEIMER KIDS

THE WEISENHEIMER KIDS

Last of the willows. First of the doomed.

We brought home the possibilities then, 

in a suitcase while alone at the door. I was

writing the Memoirs of Charles DeGaulle

and just making it up. Paid by the word and 

all that. Stayed up once, right through the night

drinking wine and whiskey until even the words

puked out : landy-lady-lakes-looping.

-

Once I saw, you looked at your watch. It was ten

after five at five after ten. The year was once more

1972; lost in the flood. Bennie and the Jets versus

Ram. Does anyone really know what time it is?

6977. IS IT TRUE?

IS IT TRUE?

Is it true what they say about Dixie? Does the

sun really shine all the time? Are the cardboard

idols just cardboard? Are you forgetting you once 

were mine? I do think that was  -  as I was told  -  

the last tune that Abe Lincoln ever danced to.

-

Don't know, really. In the harbor, the fishhouse shoals

are as smelly as ever, but two ironclads are there, listing

at the hulls. Someone someday wants a museum here. I

don't know  -  just more ways to make lies about things

that shouldn't be told. Ways of killing in days of old.

6976. DUSTBOMB

DUSTBOMB

(Swift's Hibernian Lodge, e4th street)

Macready at the ready  -  the junk shop along near

Houston Street was getting cleaned out. 'No more

of that for us here.' The big guy with the two beers, 

he said, 'we've been ready for this for a long time. It's

just a shame this city loses its flavor little by little.'

-

'Well, sit you down, fella, and order up another round - 

it's late afternoon, I've got nowhere to go, you're seeming

fine, and I love talking to old-timers, denizens of the

neighborhood, all that, you know. It's on me, OK.'

-

Then Belinda came over, the barkeep, the girl who'd

replaced Bernadette, who moved to Hawaii with some

guy she just met. Right here too. I gave her a ride on my

motorcycle once, she was really thrilled, and then I pretty 

much drank for free the rest of that day  -  but I screwed 

myself up too. Wobbly enough, I left her a twenty 

by mistake -  having meant it to be but a five.

-

Belinda said : 'Don't listen to that wheezebag (he'd gone to

the men's room then), he's full of shit; and two months ago

he wasn't even around here.' Nice thing for her to say. I'd

just bought a round and a pitcher, and the two Irish guys at

the end of the bar  -  they too were getting interested, and 

loose enough to stay. I realized the position I was in.

-

'That's OK, I said. Around here, bullshit pays, and so do

I evidently  -  but whatever, I'm having fun and I'll take

me this one chance at glory. Something good always 

comes of mysterious circumstances, no?' All she

said back  -  with that crooked smirk of hers, was

'No'.

6975. HOW WE MAKE APRIL A HABIT

HOW WE MAKE APRIL A HABIT

She's the wisp of a dream,the daughter we lost at sea,

the month of new things  -  an idea we'd like to be.

Intent on servicing despair, the mind toys with a

better idea  -  and there she is, our April again.

-

Cannot mind the rain, or the wind, or even untimely

cold. Nothing stays, and we all now it's going away.

She just makes the heart feel good, this old girl, again.

6974. INTENT TO BELITTLE THE BATTLE

INTENT TO BELITTLE 

THE BATTLE

Into the inferno goes Johnny Archer.

'We'll never see him alive again.'

-

Outside the circus tent, so many are doing so little.

'A nation of hoots and thieves, that's all.'

-

Inside, the freak show was running over. The

crowd mumbled and roared. 'I swear, never again!'

-

Understanding everything, which was nothing at all,

I stood alongside the barker, holding my tickets in the rain.

6973. HANG DOWN

HANG DOWN

Redcoats and Dutchmen hanging from trees. 

Nathan Hale Lane, with all those new condos

spinning. Nothing but dirt under these dirty

fingernails. I came home late yesterday, dragging

a rake. Johnny Appleseed I want to be. All over,

that so very quickly again. Here, take this apple.

-

My Packard took over your Hudson, your Ambassador

ran my Commander clear out of town. Now, I have to

look at you and see you as a farmer, which you are now

claiming to be. Underneath that body-rack, all I can

see is that you're a lady, but I guess they can be 

farmers too. Apples don't fall far from the trees.

-

'Hang down your head, Tom Dooley.

Hang down your head and cry.

Hang down your head, Tom Dooley.

Poor boy, you're going to die.'

6972. NASTY, BRUTISH, AND SHORT

NASTY, BRUTISH, AND SHORT

Somehow we've all heard that before : the ledge

beneath the window will not hold you, don't step 

on it, don't even try. Off along the county ridge,

where the patrol cars never go, we swing on a rope

high above the gorge, and drop dead-straight down

into the hole for swimming  -  not much, but if you

miss, you're a goner. Always more of what you want

than of what you've actually got  -  but that's 

what dreaming's all about, isn't it?

6971. THE KILLER HAD A CAMERA

THE KILLER 

HAD A CAMERA

That's all they said. Five will get you ten he

was running. Snapping. Running again.

6970. THE WISE MAN IS WISE, BUT THE BOUNDARIES ARE CHEAP

THE WISE MAN IS WISE, BUT 

THE BOUNDARIES ARE CHEAP

When you say random, there's nothing random at all  -  

circumstances change, yes, but where you walk it is

already written. You cannot change the steps.

-

Not too distant, the blue of the water spills itself,

falling into the commerce which has ruined this

world. Barricades and barriers will keep you from

your shoreline  -  money comes first, please understand.

-

And that is why people die in wars : to vouchsafe for

others the right of return  -  dollars and values have no

sense at all, and all war in senseless. No matter; yet 

we go into debt to wait and stand by to die.

-

I really don't know who I would slap down first,

were we to meet. Peter Minuit, or Peter Stuyvesant.

I know where they were, and I know where they are,

what I don't understand is their day or their hour.

How could they have done these things to me?

6969. SENSATIONAL MONTEVERDI

SENSATIONAL MONTEVERDI

The catwalk was covered with models thin enough

to be saltines. Girls looked gaunt, and the boys looked

like girls. No stretch of the imagination there. Whatever

happens happens. If I had wanted to be arraigned for

starvation, I could have been : needle-marks and the

traces of heroin and cocaine could be found 'neath the

lid. Those people sitting in the front rows, they only

pretend at adulation : you see, please understand, they're

really vultures set out to pick and kill off one another;

hawks, hunters, robbers and thieves. Fashion has a

spindle-soul hereabouts, if you'd even wish to 

call it that. The Mexican cantina next door is

catering this crud. Why, I'll never know.

6968. THE SUN COME PUTTERING IN

THE SUN COME PUTTERING IN 

At the house of the guardian angels, the new 

day's light hit the windows and lit the kitchen 

gold. All those morning things started happening 

again : water went to coffee,  darkness turned to 

light. While we talked, the magic match of an

idea was lit, yet I couldn't understand your words.

Angels had come down the stairway and each

held another candle of sunlight. What brilliance!

I had come from nowhere  -  I knew that  -  and

for sure was headed back to that very same place. 

I knew that too. This room was my last refuge;

so I pulled the plug on my internal light, and

let all the rest do its work for me, as the

sun come puttering in.

6967. HAVING DEACTIVATED ALL PRECAUTIONS

HAVING DEACTIVATED 

ALL PRECAUTIONS

I'm ranting and I've raving too  -  I've been struck 

through with the silver lance and cauterized by a

forest fire. I howl, and my fair mouth quivers in

a scream. I hold this horse's head screaming down

to the ground  -  some Guernica of my own admission :

enticing blood and carnage, cutting tribes in two. 

Women, children, babies, flaming droplets from 

the sky. Who wants to own just a lazy afternoon?

-

The cripples have come back from the show : now they're

playing records backwards, to make sure Paul is still

dead, or the Mayor of Casterbridge still has his awards.

They slop and they drool, they pillage at sun-up and

sleep through their meals. Bastards and fools, all.

-

I am walking sideways in my sleep right into their

dreams  -  I can see what they mean by parting their

curtains. Intuit the ending. Learn the meaning of all

that's said. Dim lights. Strong Sessions. Clean the slate.

All precautions have been turned off again.

6966. FULL RECOMPENSE

FULL RECOMPENSE

The trouble with the insurance companies is 

that they all suck dick : they want your money 

when it's due, yet they won't let go of it. Everything 

is denied  -  your claim is without  -  sir  -  justification.

Like yet another Jew dentist killing helpless animals,

things come out appearing different than they really 

are. There's nothing helpless about a lion really  -  

and it should have rendered that bastard to shreds. 

But what's the dentist care? He can make it up on 

the Day of Atonement and get (yet another) pass.

This world is a royal joke. The trouble with 

politicians is they believe all this shit. 

The problem with me: I believe none of it.

6965. BREWSTER AND CAGE

BREWSTER AND CAGE

I wake up in the morning, it's already too late; 

the roosters are gone with the ladles, the sidearms

are gone with the guns. Only a pessimist would think

this is good. I have a hundred petals from flowers that

never bloomed. (Am I crazy, or is it hot in this room)?

6964. GAUNT AND GONE

GAUNT AND GONE

Here's the reason for that : the landing

never landed and the moon is still of

cheese. OK? I am the thin man, telling

you this. Don't look at the nighttime

sky for answers. There are none.

-

You were placed here, like a jewel on a

black velvet night, to float through your 

piers of illusion. Go see, and look, how

crisp and defined most everything is.

-

Hazelton? Trenton? West Paterson? 

Again? All that ever comes through 

is the noise of the wires, not the 

sound of the words being spoken.

6963. BEING DETERMINED TO DISAPPEAR

BEING DETERMINED 

TO DISAPPEAR

A seance was held in my building; the lights went

down and the whole place seemed dead  -  even the

elevator, usually a sparkle, went sluggish. I heard voices

in other rooms  -  and when I went to them,. even those 

rooms had disappeared. I was left holding the proverbial

bag. The lights flickered some, then grew brilliantly white,

then again down to nothing. Sure that I had heard doors

closing and opening, I looked, but there were no longer

any doors. Just voices. Whatever had gotten started

was now long underway. Spirits made manifest their

presences - windows slapping, where there were none,

and stairways offering me no exit arose, where before

there'd been but a wall. Things grew larger, and those

which didn't grew smaller. Just as well, I couldn't tell.

Everything met in the middle, being determined to 

disappear. A white light in the center hall opened up,

into a whiter space with rays of blue  -  moving outward,

those rays apparently took everything up, with them, away.

I found the illusion telling, and suddenly understood what

my own life had been  -  and the reality behind it. Now

buttressed with more certainty than ever before. This

went on for a while, then things went away  -  being

just determined again to disappear.

6962. STEELMAN OASIS

STEELMAN OASIS

Where I went the fence was made of oats,

the streets were tar, and the small stores all

sold gold. Dizzy with sensation, I watched the

people pass. The guy from Princeton asked about

me, and I answered him rightly. Then he said he'd

'graduated' in 2012'  -  I'd asked when he 'got out.'

Bangor, Pennsylvania was the place, and is today.

The fuel pump was marked 'heating oil'  -  I guess

they can buy it by the gallon. We drove a while,

to the hardware store where I was looking for

paint and cables  -  found both. I told him to go

and I'd walk the way back. With a thanks, he left.

-

My walk back to town took me past the stonecarver's

place  -  gravestones in every corner, just waiting, I 

guess. They don't much cut by knife or chisel anymore  -

it's all laser'd and machine cut. But he was on his knees,

I watched, cutting a stone the old way. What was so

odd about it was this : he'd carved the lady's name,

Helen Whitnauer, or something like that, and was,

just beneath it, now involved in cutting in the 

smaller words : 'nee Christ.' This is true, 

and I'd never seen it before. I felt like

a stranger, on the road to Emmaus.